Friday, March 30, 2007

Introducing Chemical Schlong

My good friend Stormy does this thing on her blog, called Private Part Fridays. In it, she talks about the important groinal issues of the day. You really should make a note in your dayplanner to read it. Anyhow, a while ago, when bandying about possible topics, we got to talking about men who Nair their nether regions, and we decided that if we started a band, the name would be Chemical Schlong.

As we don't know when to leave well enough alone, we thought it would be a good idea to come up with our song list for our first album. Obviously, we went with an eponymous album title. I like to think that when we get to our fourth album, we'll do the same thing, so that people will then have to give their own titles to each of them so that they can distinguish between them, much like people have to do with the Green and Blue Weezer albums. But that is far in the future.

For now, I would like to present to you the playlist for Chemical Schlong's debut album (which you can also find chez Stormy). We have decided to do our own covers of songs, with a few minor lyric and theme changes. Enjoy.

Chemical Schlong

Sexy back (Justin Timberlake) Back hair = not hot. We're taking hairy back.
I bleed (The Pixies) A musical how-to guide to injury-free shaving.
Wave of mutilation (The Pixies) A songcycle highlighting hair removal horror stories.
Inbetween days (The Cure) The ugly side of stubble.
Boys don’t cry (The Cure) And men don't cry when they get their back waxed either.
Is it in you? (Charlatans) Poison Control telephone numbers put to song in case of accidental ingestion of depilatories.
Where is the line? (Bjork) Brazilian or Bikini?
Electric Renaissance (Belle and Sebastian) A duet about electric razors vs. waxing.
Hotwax (Beck)
Burnin (Daft Punk)

I'll be sure to let you all know when the album is released for public consumption, and of any tour dates.


The Stormy Diva said...

Ha! I have a label/tag. Classify me baby, CLASSIFY ME!

Table Mabel said...

That's right baby, I classified you. Stick with me kid, and you'll go places!