Saturday, March 3, 2007

Mister Cab Driver

I have this theory.

In a former life, I was a cabbie. And not just any cabbie, oh no, I was a terrible cabbie. A cabbie who rigged her meter to overcharge unsuspecting passengers, who refused to take direction, who got lost all the time, who drove so recklessly as to cause accidents wherever she went. A cabbie who brought terror and anger to her fares. And now in this life I'm getting my karmic payback.

I'm sure there are nice cabbies out there, but lord knows they don't seem to pick me up. My friends can testify to the fact that while I do take cabs more often than them (no car and laziness - not a good combo) I get more than my fair share of wackos. There was the time the cabbie yelled at me because he was concerned I wanted to make a couple of stops en route, and even when I said no, he kept freaking out. Or the time when a cabbie refused to listen to my directions, missed the exit, thereby adding at least another 6$ to the fare. Oh, and the time when I was rudely informed that the intersection I wanted to go to didn't exist, even though it totally did. And let's not even get into the time I spent a rush hour trip with Mr "Those damn immigrants are ruining everything by being on welfare". Sigh.

But for all the insane cabbies that make me fear for my life, or at the very least want to bash my head repeatedly into concrete, there have been two that were awesome. One is an older gentleman, with a beard like Santa. He drives me home from curling on occasion. He remembers me, even though there was a 7 month gap between rides. He always opens the door for me. Until tonight, he was the only one who I wouldn't mind driving me again.

Tonight, after a humiliating loss, a cabbie came to pick me up and he wanted to know all about curling - which reminds me of the cabbie who lectured me about how stupid curling is and how I shouldn't waste my time with it, especially because I was a girl. I'd forgotten that one. Boy that was a fun trip. Anyhow, I explained to the cabbie tonight that while losing is never fun, it might have been the best thing for us. See, we're gearing up for the playoffs, and we've been doing pretty well. After this week, we all get seeded, and the way we'd been going, there was a pretty good chance we'd end up in 'A' Division. Problem is, we aren't really 'A' Division material. We've been lucky. We've played some weak teams. And if we end up in 'A' Division, we will get our asses kicked so hard they'll be coming out our mouths. As a team, we agreed that this wasn't something we were looking forward to, so we joked about tanking tonight's game. We didn't though. We got beat soundly just by sucking royally. The cabbie wasn't sure that maybe we didn't tank it subconsciously, and was concerned that maybe our plan would backfire, and we'd still end up in 'A' despite everything, or that we'd have to play this team again and lose. He talked strategy with me. Not that he knew anything about curling, he just wanted to chat. Combine that with the fact that he got me home quickly and without any close calls, and he may be my favourite cabbie ever.

I hope that if I'm heading home after the finals and I need a cab that he is on call. Thanks sir, for restoring my faith in cabdrivers. Now if you could just do something about my poor shot-making...

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