I still can't think about it without giggling with joy.
The last assignment was the last straw. I went in, and handed in my part (as well as the two that were way off point) and explained everything. Then, in a brilliant move reminiscent of a great general manager, the prof pulled off a spectacular trade.
I got moved to a team with one seriously under-performing member, who was shipped back to my team. And I couldn't be more thrilled. This team, while not perfect, actually gets works done, and doesn't make me want to bash myself on the head every second while working on the project.
I got to break the news to my team. I told the two of them who were in class (Mr. "I speak for the group" didn't show and didn't send in his work either) and later I sent the whole team an email detailing the change, and I included all the work I had done so far. I haven't heard back from them, and it just makes me all tingly.
But, something happened to make me think that maybe I underestimated Fratty McFratterson. He was one of the two who came to class, and I told him about the trade immediately. He replied immediately, with a shocked look on his face, "No fair! We're trading a 5-star for a 1-star!" I guess he is more perceptive than I thought. And I appreciate the compliment. I'm glad someone noticed.