Your logic does not resemble our Earth logic

I'm listening to the good old mothercorp: classic on the radio this morning, willing the clock to wind back so I can sleep more, when I hear something that makes me think I have something crazy in my ear.

Seems that an executive for Taser brand tasers (accept no substitutes! buy name brands only!) is in town to give a talk about just how fantastic tasers can make all our lives. Andy is being his usual crusty self, not letting the exec get away with his talking points. Despite idiotic, bile-inducing statements about how name-brand tasers have never been used by criminals, so he has no reason to worry about criminals using the technology on innocent victims, and how the people who have died after being tazed were totally going to die for other reasons and tasers weren't at all a factor, up till this point it is just another interview.

Then a question was asked questioning the frequency with which tasers are being used on unarmed people. My ears perked up, wondering how the exec was going to double-speak his way out of this one, and murmuring a quick word of thanks for the fact that some people can still ask the tough questions. In response, the exec immediately retorted that this was simply not true, as people have arms and legs, which are the first line of attack, so an unarmed person is never the target of the taser. I know, I heard it too. But it got me to thinking, I mean, I always knew not being born without legs and arms would come back to bite me in the ass, and look what happened. I'm a pacifist, and don't believe in carrying arms, and now it turns out I have been doing so all my life. I'm such a hypocrite.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to register myself as a dangerous weapon.